Kimberly Gardner

Or: What’s your frame of reference?

This question was recently posed to me and, quite honestly, caught me flat-footed and with no response.

Note to self — Prepare snappy reply for next time this question comes up.

Let me set the scene for you.

I was talking with a friend about my upcoming release, The Ties That Bind, and she asked me why do you write gay romance? I mean, what is your frame of reference?

I don’t know why but it never occurred to me that anyone would wonder why I chose the subgenre of romance that I have and, as noted above, I had no idea what to say. I think I stammered out something like if one sexy hero is good then two are better, not a terrible response, but also not the one I should of made.

In discussing the question later with my husband he made a very astute observation. He said, “How would it be any different if you were writing straight romance/sex since you’ve only experienced that from one point of view?” He’s a pretty smart guy, my husband. *grin*

What, after all, is the purpose of fiction if not to experience things that are outside the realm of our everyday lives? But for me, a straight woman writing gay romance, it goes even further than that.

In my stories it’s the falling in love and the formation of an emotional bond that matters most not the equipment of the lovers. There are an infinite number of ways to find love and tend a growing relationship. My stories explore some of those paths. And though the gender of the lovers plays a role in the story it doesn’t predetermine what the story will or will not be, whether there will be a HEA (happily ever after) or HFN (happy for now). Nor does their gender dictate, any more than in any other romance, the obstacles the lovers will confront on the way to that end. 

What difference should it make if, during the sex scenes, tab A goes into slot B or somewhere else?

My answer is that it makes no difference because it’s the romance, the falling in love, that matters rather than the gender of the characters doing the falling.

And that, dear readers, is my answer.

Now, to condense the above into a snappy reply of two sentences or less.